Borderline personality disorder is a personality disorder characterized by mental instability, warped perceptions of oneself and others, and impulsive and dangerous behavior. Borderline personality disorder is diagnosed much more often in women than men, with a 3:1 ratio of women to men in terms of diagnoses. Women with this disorder are often slutty, magical, unstable and histrionic, being prone to chaotic behavioral patterns such as engaging in self-harm, having short and intense relationships, and organizing cyber bullying campaigns, among other things.
Dating a BPD person
A relationship with a BPD person will alternate between being euphoric and dysphoric. BPD partners seem perfect at first. Their demeanor is beautifully sweet, playful, spontaneous, electric, sensitive, and vulnerable. The BPD individuals will also act as good friends, as BPD individuals mold their personality to their dating partners, to an abnormal extent. After a certain amount of time, a very strange side of them starts to slip, and a BPD partner will start to engage in all sorts of destructive, "push-pull", behavior. For example, being the perfect sexual partner one day, and being violently rageful the next, for seemingly no good reason.
This drama is primarily driven by intense fears of abandonment that BPD labeled individuals have. Their insecure attachment style is often a standard fixture throughout their lives, sabotaging both romantic and platonic relationships. Don't be surprised if a BPD person you are dating says that their friends continually leave them.
All in all, dating a BPD person is an adventure in and of itself. The relationships are often short and exciting. Evidence has suggested BPD individuals have a, "fast life history strategy" (think 'live fast, die young'), as BPD has been linked to lower investment in offspring and an earlier age of sexual debut, both fast life history traits. BPD individuals are ultimately dangerous and high-drama to have in one's life.
Incel forum members dating BPD women
BPD girls can sometimes be a source of sex for people who would otherwise be incel.
Incelistan once renamed their forum to, “Nice guys for BPD girls” as a joke for a day. Some women, excited by the prospects of such a forum, complained after the name changed back to “incelistan”.
Men are attracted to BPD in attractive women
After seeing lots of anectodal evidence that men tied, "hot", women, to "crazy", women, an evolutionary psychologist and sociologist named Alyson E Blanchard hypothesized there was more to this story. Her hypothesis was that instead of hot women being crazy, men are attracted to crazy in hot women. After a comprehensive peer-reviewed study on the matter for Personality and Individual Differences Alyson's research team came to the conclusion that men are particularly attracted to borderline traits in good looking women.
She also found that women are attracted to borderline traits in wealthy, but low attractive men.
Arguments about people labeled BPD
Men's advocates such as Paul Elam strongly recommend against men ever dating someone labeled BPD. This advice would likely extend to incels as well. Other notable MRAs chose to work in men's rights advocacy simply because of experiences with women labeled BPD.
Other people, in a more anti-psychiatric manner, assert BPD is simply run of the mill predatory behaviour. They argue BPD shouldn't be pathologized in a way that makes the person labeled with the disorder use it as a constant excuse.
Pop psychology often says women with BPD traits tend to seek out nice guys, and the reason they do this is so they get less pushback for what they often know themselves as predatory or emotionally damaging behaviour. Many malecels who have only had 1-2 women interested in them in their entire lives have relayed those women self-admitting to a BPD diagnosis or that the women exhibited BPD traits after getting to know them.
The anti-Gamergate movement arguably had a pro-borderline disorder tinge.
Borderlines and LGBT
According to an article in the American Journal of Psychiatry, half of borderline personality disordered men studied were homosexual.
"[The researchers obtained the sexual histories of 80 patients who met standardized criteria for borderline disorder and found that 17 (21%) of these patients were homosexual, four (5%) were bisexual, and nine (11%) had diagnoses of paraphilias. Ten (53%) of the 19 men with borderline disorder were homosexual, compared with seven (11%) of the 61 women. Homosexuality was 10 times more common among the men and six times more common among the women with borderline personality disorder than in the general population or in a depressed control group."
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